JOU+JR

Jenn Rush's Journal

After reading the poems and analyzing whether or not God was represented by the imagery, I realized that Mary Oliver's poem, ‍‍‍‍‍The Swan, ‍‍‍‍‍ was most influential to me. Her detailed imagery of the flight of the bird and the underlying connotations of the symbolism representing God were evident, yet not overwhelmingly so. Her words seemed to easily portray the majestic and divine flight of the bird as it circled through different landscapes, inspiring those who crossed its path. The phrase, "An armful of white blossoms, / A perfect commotion of silk and linen as it leaned..." conveyed the idea that nature retains a certain element of perfection in a disorganized yet beautiful way. When I read this poem over and over, I almost feel as if the swan is taking flight right in front of me. I envision myself standing next to a small reedy lake where this great bird outstretches its great wings and disturbs the still water as is rises in flight. The imagery is vivid and makes me take a step back to appreciate mundane observations- similar to those in Ann Sexton’s poem. The flight of the bird, the rain against the trees, and the movement of water can provoke such deep thoughts and emotions if one only takes the time to breathe and take in what surrounds him or her. The poem reminds me that life is not defined by achieving goals but it is also about appreciating life that surrounds me each and every day so that I can appreciate God’s gifts in nature.
 * Jou1**: Of the four poems you've read thus far, which one draws you? Why?

GG: Thank you for the graphic! It is so good to hear you say this, JR. When a poem has that type of impact on the reader, the poet is also soaring with delight!
So many of us find our God in nature - His creation!

**Jou2:**
===**W.H. Auden's poem "Stop all the Clocks" is a truly profound poem. I believe that this particular poem was most grace filled by the nature of the imagery. Auden portrayed that God affected every person in some way- whether he or she was aware of it or not. It is apparent that Auden was greatly moved by this death and his tone and imagery makes the reader gain a sense of his frustration as he abandons all hope because "nothing now can ever come to any good." These words are so striking because the reader understands that this great love between the narrator and the man who died fades because the speaker sees no light at the end of the tunnel and remains in this depressed mood. God's grace fills this poem in that each line is filled with connotations of His grace incorporated into every piece of life. This grace is also found in the grief of the narrator because the reader sees that there was such a profound love between the two.**===

**G: What is curious is that the speaker sees no hope, no redemption, nothing beyond the temporal, so if you find grace in this poem, it is because you are finding it. For Auden's speaker, there is nothing.** The Christian teaching is that grace is unmerited mercy that God gave to us by sending his son to die on a cross to give us eternal salvation.

I see God’s presence each day around me, primarily in nature. Sometimes I enjoy walking through the woods behind my house and I find God incarnated in the silence and perfection of the chaos of my surroundings. Smelling the pine needles carefully arranged on the ground while climbing over broken tree stumps reminds me that nature retains a secrecy that only God is familiar with. I also see the incarnation of God in animals. I have been blessed to have dogs, cats, and horses (as well as lizards, snakes, salamanders, toads, and turtles!) as a part of my life and I can see a part of God’s face in each one of them. Each one has adorable characteristics that reflect such innocence and personality that is rather fleeting in children as they grow up influenced by society. Even as I write this, my dog is kicking me while she attempts to sleep on the couch. I can look into any animals eyes and see a piece of God peering back at me which is so magical. I believe that animals are a true reincarnation of God- angels meant to guide us through important moments in our life where we need an extra friend or just God’s presence in our lives.
 * JOU 3 ** : What in the world gives you the sense of incarnation and sacrament?

GG: I agree! I often find God's face in the face of His creatures that are not human. Something, perhaps, about their simplicity and their innocence?

Jou 4: Irony seems to be cleverly sprinkled throughout O’Connor’s literary pieces. In the title “A Good Man is Hard to Find” seems to be ironic because all throughout the story, the reader questions the definition of a true “good man.” The grandmother seems to loosely throw around the term in order to attempt to sympathize with some one less fortunate of herself. At first, she addresses the gas station man as a “good man” because he tried to give people a chance and to see the fundamental good in everyone. Therefore, his naïveté earned him such an indefinable title. Lastly the grandmother calls the Misfit a “good man” because she tries to spare her own life by appealing to the scoundrel’s softer side. The repetition of the term leads it to seem jaded as well as a common label applicable to nearly anyone- even if every bone he has is malicious. The term becomes so commonplace that it seems everyone can be a “good man.” If this is the case, one is certainly not hard to find! This is the root of the irony in the story. GG: LATE (drops a score): Interesting that you cite grandmother's manipulating the Misfit - or trying to do so. Jou 5:

If I met the Misfit, I would first be scared out of my mind knowing that I had just made the aquaintacne of a psychopathic killer. After I I would get over the initial shock, I would keep the conversation very breif. I would ask him about himself, about his life, and what drove him to mercilessly make people suffer even if they seem to have done nothing wrong. Hopefully none of these wuestions would upset him so I would then turn the conversation over to God and faith. I would ask the misfit if he believes in heaven and if he has a chance to be saved. He would probably say that If we know for a fact that Jesus came one and died to save us, then yes, we all have a chance to be saved but that he knows that he is not going to heaven because of what he has done. I would then say that he has a strong faith and should try talking with God. He would say that he doesn't know if God is listening because God never answers in words. This small talk would continue for about 5 minutes and I would then shake his calloused dry hand and.......RUN! GG: LATE (drops a score): I think you like the Misfit! Jou 6: The "N" word can seem very intimidating because many people feel hoghly uncomfortable using it. I am one of those people. If I had to explain to another person what that word meant and why some people use it and others say that it is highly derogatory, I would answer simply. I would tell them that this word used to be used to refer to a person of colored skin to degrade his position in society. I would continue to say that she should never, ever, ever use such a word to describe anyone of colored skin because it has terrible conotations that can leave someone feeling very sore. In literature that embodies racial conflict such as "The Artificial Nigger" the word is used to portray accuracy of speech as well as the hatred many white people had towards the blacks. The verbal violence demonstrated by Mr. Head makes the reader realize his ignorance and naivite towards the human race. Through God's grace and for giveness, Mr. Head and Nelson realize that all people are valuable no matter the color of their skin. This idea is not directly obvious but we knoe that Mr. Head and Nelson have an epiphany which makes them more morally and spiritually rich.

GG: Late (drops a score): The verbal violence - do you mean in the denial?

Jou 7: Most of the time, events that seem particularly "terrible" do not seem comical at the time of their occurrence. It is upon reflection on such hard times that can sometimes bring joy, laughter, and even a good joke amongst friends. I cannot think of a significant time in my life that was terrible but comical. There are, however, several petty instances that come to mind. One that I think is quite relatable is of a time that I got lost at Six Flags. This sort of unfortunate event seems to happen to almost every child at some point in his or her life. This whole fiasco happened when I was about five years old. While I was walking along (with who I thought were my parents and friends), I turned to talk to one of them and notices that I was surrounded by complete strangers who didn’t even vaguely resemble my mom and dad. I broke down, thinking that all hope was lost and that my life was over. I ran into one of the nearby shops, bawling, and asked to be taken to that place where lost children can wait for their parents. The store employee began to walk me outside the shop towards that foreboding “waiting” area when my parents, nearly breathless, called out my name. In an unbelievable wave of relief, I ran back to them. They said they had found me because of the hat I was wearing- a bright orange (fairly hideous) hat. Now that we look back on it, we can laugh. I can still remember how absolutely mortified I felt and how comical it is today! GG: I hope you saved the hat. It is a good reminder - an ikon - of getting lost and coming home!

Jou8: So far in the novel, I have hope for the young curate and I pity him. There is a lot of physical pain in his life and the people of the village seem to have turned on him and are very selfish towards him in that they almost seem to refuse to understand him. I feel that he needs to try to break through the depressing atmosphere hanging above the village and try to speak the vibrant word of God to the people, whether or not they are ready to accept the message at first. I sympathize with the priest because I understand some of his feelings and can understand what it is like to be initially misunderstood and therefore silently rejected. I was very intrigued by the beautiful yet dismal imagery within these chapters because I could clearly picture what was happening but after a while, all of the events began to blend together. I can imagine that these were possibly some of the sentiments of the curate because every day was filled with rejection, mockery, abandonment, and fear to an extent because he did not know how to pry these people from this great "ennui." GG: Pity rather than empathy, right? What makes you pity him? What do you think he is missing?

Jou 9: This quote reminds me of a concept that we covered while discussing Flannery O’Connor’s writings. We discussed how God potentially allows each person to endure suffering and that he will only give us what we can handle. Suffering makes us stronger and gives us the strength to build our faith to help nourish our spirits- that is why God brings suffering into our lives. I also get the impression that the Cure wants to tell the priest that even though God does not seem like he is present, he actually is present but in an unlikely way- through suffering. Maybe God can be found in the young priest’s stomach pains? Who knows! Also, it is a possibility that God intends to keep the priest in sorrow a s a punishment for failing to properly guide his community. Although that is not the most likely of situations, I believe that God wants him to be sorrowful to gain some sort of new appreciation for his community to relate to the impoverished ones and to learn that every person goes through hardships and struggles and that life cannot and will not be a “cake-walk.” GG: That is very much what the Cure wants to tell the young priest. The question is: Can the young priest see this in his life?

Jou 10:

"Does it matter.......Grace is everywhere." is a truly profound statement. From what we have previously read with Flannery O’Connor, Flannery makes it evident that anyone can find grace anywhere- he or she just has to be open to receiving it. Grace is truly everywhere and can be found in anyone or anything. Sometimes I perceive grace as a sort of Easter egg hunt- when you are in need of God’s grace, it is up to you to go and find it. It is all around us but we might not see it. The young priest has to come to term with his pain- both mental and physical. I think he finds God and Hid grace through the silence. In Chapter 8, there is a point where he finds comfort and perhaps grace in the silence because he almost feels as if God is bringing ease to his soul by closing his lips with His hand to put him in this silence. I get the impression that silence and peace (physical and internal) are some of the grace that the priest finds, or wants to find in his life. GG: Yes! Open to grace! That is the key. You have it now!!! He searched and searched and at his death learns he had it all the time. A bit like the characters in the "Wizard of Oz."

Jou 11: Same as Jou 10....

JOU 12:

The two themes that stand out in my mind are suffering and redemption. These are the two particular characteristics because they are both embodied by the curate as well as other characters. The priest is obviously physically suffering from his stomach cancer but is also spiritually suffering as he struggles to find God and His grace in his life. Other characters like Mme. Chantal are also suffering with grief and the loss of spirituality and faith in their lives because they blame God for their problems. The other element of redemption is evident throughout the novel when we see some characters forgive others. The priest fervently runs around trying to help save others and reconnect them with God because they do not see God as a positive influence active in their lives. Even the priest experiences redemption by asking for absolution from his druggist acquaintance before he dies. He helps other villagers on their quest for redemption by bringing them peace and closure by attempting to act as a priest- a stronghold for the community. GG: The entire concept of redemption is hard to grasp. We believe we are redeemed by the Cross, and it is, thus, our mission in life to "live out" that redemption. That is grace. Jou 13:

Catherine’s relationship with Morris is a great source of contention thus far in the novel. Catherine is a malleable character and she strives to please others and attempts to do so by acting loyal to others. Morris sees this characteristic of hers and it is possible that he is trying to manipulate her to gain access to her money. Dr. Sloper believes that Morris can only “love” Catherine because of her naiveté and abundance of money. This quote demonstrates Morris’ determination to have Catherine remain faithful and loyal to him despite her father’s objections to their relationship. At this point in the novel it is difficult to determine Morris’ motives and his true characteristics because each character holds a unique viewpoint of other characters and therefore, the reader is unable to determine whose opinion holds the most truth. I would like to think that Morris is desperately in love with Catherine and does not want to lose her because of some possible misconceptions her father might have but I will have to read further in the book to see what will unfold. GG: Keep reading! :)

Jou 14:

I never consistently kept a journal, even though I probably should have. If I were Catherine, I would be writing all of my emotions, confusions, concerns, and questions and comments- so much so that I would be burning through so many pages; I would have to start making my own paper! Catherine, at this point in the novel is feeling so much anxiety and confusion that she might actually need a psychiatrist, not a journal. Not only is she dealing with the stress of a disapproving father, but she is also getting married to her fiancée with whom she had her first and only relationship. The main thing that I would write would be overwhelming emotions- although trying to actually write down emotions tangibly seems nearly impossible! Since I sometimes find myself experiencing writer’s block, I might express my emotions in a physical way such as screaming into a pillow, sobbing incessantly, or burning paper or smashing breakable things. Those are far easier to do than writing… yes, journal writing would be far too difficult. GG: journal writing is good in that it pushes us to a discipline of reflection. It would have been quite common in Catherine's eRa. Today, we blog.

Jou 15: This quote reminds me of the novel I just finished in French, Candide, by Voltaire. Towards the end Voltaire enlightens the reader to an interesting philosophy; each person has a sort of garden. This is a mental garden where all of life's experiences become flowers and vegetation. It does not matter if your experiences were wonderful or terrible, it is important that you lived through it and experienced it. He goes on to imply that the best of all possible worlds is your own "world" being your life. Your garden doesn't have to be big or small, but your life journey creates and nourishes your garden. The prompt is similar to this. In Washington Square, Catherine struggled significantly but she learned from her experiences and became stronger from them. The made the best of her mistakes but managed to move on and turn those mistakes into positive lessons- something she had to experience.

GG: it would be interesting to read Washington Square: Part II.